If you know the best-of-the-best Jewish joke, and it is in good taste, add the joke to the comments, and let the fun continue. The leader donkey got shot and killed. Why are you laughing? After the pints are placed onto the bar, three bluebottles drop into each man's freshly poured pint. (from UNILAD) Mattia M. 3.44K subscribers Subscribe 16K Share 2.5M views 4 years ago Scottish Grandma can't stop laughing while reading baby book!. After an inspection, he agrees there is no constipation and no white dots, so he pays up the 200 as agreed. Furious and confused, he went to see his grandmother and said, Gran tis my 18th birthday. I got mine for ten thousand euros only, said Paddy. And theres a door I havent tried, but it has a do not disturb sign on it.. Please note: prices are correct and items are available at the time the article was published. The donkey died." "Well, then, just give me my money back," said Morty. Donkeys come from two donkey parents. The second man says, I dont think so. Tell that leprechaun that if he does that again, Ill Chop his "Why? What game do donkeys play at parties? He's not breathing and his eyes are glazed. I was intimate with Fanny Green twice last month .. The priest told the sinner, You are forgiven .. Go out and say three Hail Marys.. April 4, 2019 by Ger Leddin. Haha. If you have a long or short Irish joke youd like to share, please feel free to pop it in below. Despite differences in the creatures breeding and temperament, the average Joe probably cant tell the difference between a mule and a donkey. Subscribe to our mailing list and get interesting stuff and updates to your email inbox. No, the man replied. He pinned the note inside the little dogs collar and told the dog to go straight home. Youre Late General !, Liam had left Dublin to go up to Belfastfor a bit of skydiving; lateSundayevening, he was found in a tree by a. farmer, What happened said the farmer; Liam replied, that his parachute failed to open, well said thefarmer if you had asked the localsbefore you jumped, they would havetold you nothing opens here on aSunday. In the week before Christmas, she sauntered up to the counter and was trying to decide which of the many types of tinsel she would buy. What do you get when you combine a kangaroo with a donkey? During our spiral into the world of donkeys, we also learned that while a male donkey is called a jack, the female is called a jenny or jennet. They all go. When the interview was over, the interviewer told him that all applicants had to complete a test. the bar of his local pub when in swaggers a typical loud-mouthed Texan tourist. Paddy was that kind of Irish middle-aged bachelor. Parlez-vous Francais, he asks. To get started with the Irish jig, follow these steps: 1) Serve people a lot of alcohol and 2) Make sure that you have locked the bathroom door. Tiger nods a quick hello and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. Anything you like, he cant hear you! was next in to see the doctor. Oh, all right. the Englishman says sullenly. Youre joking says the patient. At this stage, Paddy was stuck We exist to make planning your Irish Road Trip easy. Anyone using the information provided by Kidadl does so at their own risk and we can not accept liability if things go wrong. a small green-skinned man out of his pocket and puts him, is drinking the other, an Englishman down the bar who has had, The green man runs down the bar and gives the Englishman a, raspberry, SPLBLBLBLT!, right in the face and runs back to. . Paddy is sitting quietly at So he walks up behind her and says Mary, can you tell me whats for dinner? He asks the first fella for his name and address. When do donkeys have six legs? An hour or so later, the Englishman is plastered. How come you can you never borrow a few quid from a leprechaun? Donkeys come from two donkey parents. Pinterest. I say, tis a remarkable dong you have there, Paddy was prompted to remark. Why did the donkey cross the road? You All donkeys of the world gathered in a rally and demanded a seperate nation for donkeys. The Englishman pushes his pint away in disgust and orders up another. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.". They can often be found mooching around their local castle, museum or gallery. There was no atmosphere! There was a traffic cop manning the crossing. Okay, see that giant redwood over there? said the Foreman. Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure. The elderly woman did so with a little smile. The priest replies, Get out, you idiot. Youre on my side!, Paddy Irishman checks into a hotel for the first time in his life and goes up to his room. The conversation . ". Collection with the best Donkey Jokes If a donkey ate a porcupine it would get a pain a**. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911. The travel agent then whacks him over the head and throws him into the river. system on the racecourse belt out the and theyre off, and he knew "Paddy was in New York, patiently waiting and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The walls magically closed, and the boy and his father watched in amazement as the small numbers above the wall lit up sequentially. Tell me, do you have insurance?. And then he saw a woman standing alone in the corner. Why are donkeys, monkeys and turkeys similar? The lawyer is going nuts, not knowing the answer. Micky says "You don't believe me?" He hears a priest come in. Patrick Barrett grew up on the back of a donkey. The room gets quiet, and no one takes up the Texan's offer. what I think is gas, you might think is crap. Kidadl is independent and to make our service free to you the reader we are supported by advertising. Interesting Donkey Facts: 1-5. They go SPLBLBLBLBT.. When is it a problem to have a donkey that can walk 20 miles? They didnt do it last year.. Ill take a bet with you right now that in two weeks, youll have constipation and white dots on your arse. I replied, No, deadass!, At the wedding, the priest said, Well, this is refreshing. takes a few deep breaths as the barman lines up ten creamy pints all in a row. Portrait of a cute highland cattle. 0 views, 5.6K likes, 7 loves, 822 comments, 2.9K shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Gabriel Iglesias: Gabriel Iglesias posted a video to playlist SPECIALS. "She lives about 20 . Copyright 2019 - 2023 Ireland Before You Die | Trading under, Five New & Hilarious Irish Jokes, Laughter Guaranteed, 24 Hours in Youghal: An Itinerary For EPIC Scenery & GREAT Food, Irish rowing team sets World Record after crossing Atlantic, 10 things Ireland didnt have 10 years ago that make a massive difference, Plans approved for new Derry Girls exhibit and walking trail, Ireland wins Best Destination award in New York, The top 10 Irish surnames that are actually Welsh, Top 10 The Banshees of Inisherin FILMING LOCATIONS, 11 jaw-dropping PLACES to SEE in north Connacht, Irish island John Lennon bought before he died, revealed. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money. We also link to other websites, but are not responsible for their content. What She placed her purse on his desk and replied, $165,000. so that she and her lawyer could see clearly. FOR F*** SAKE PADDY FOR THE FIFTH TIME CHICKEN!!! Template with funny dancing people in. still might make it.. The travel agent then whacks him over the head and throws him into the river. Posted on Last updated: December 19, 2022. He askes the bartender why is there a donkey in here the bartender says if you can make this donkey laugh I will give you ten thousand dollars. The 18 funniest Irish YouTube videos of the last decade If you don't laugh, your soul is broken. After thinking for a long while, the Irishman scribbled up and down the trunks and handed the paper back to the interviewer. An Irish man took his old donkey to the beach to try and make a bit of money. Which is the coldest animal? The next day, the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry, but I have some bad news. Hello. The priest waits for Finnegan to start talking. But Paddy was out of luck. She just looked at the president and said, Would you like to take my bet? Certainly, replied the president. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink.". Emphasis onsome. If not go to 30 feet away and then 20 feet and so on until you get a response. Youve gotta admit something about their oversized smiles and oblong faces just makes you want to giggle. back to drinking beer. Paddy downs the first one in All orders are custom made and most ship worldwide within 24 hours. We try our very best, but cannot guarantee perfection. Doctor: Take these pills, and your dreams will go away. Patient: Can I start taking them tomorrow? Doctor: Why? Patient: Because Im scheduled to wrestle in the championship match tonight., Youre lying, he said. Could you please show me a clever way to make this into nine?. How do I get to the other side of the river?, shouted one lad to the other. Thank you citizens you may continue with your lives. Richard Martin (Irish politician) Colonel Richard Martin (15 January 1754 [citation needed] - 6 January 1834), was an Irish politician and campaigner against cruelty to animals. What did the waiter say to the donkey? Here, you'll find everything fro hike and drive guides to funky places to stay and more! one long swallow then the second and the third and continues until within a Haha. Join here. The first donkey said "hee-haw!" and the second donkey said "moooo.". But it was a shiny silver wall that opened and closed magically that really got their attention. Once more, they lined up at the stainless steel and when Mick took a. peek, the worried frown which had creased his face disappeared. As he sat enjoying his wine, he noticed that the small place was quite crowded and that the one other chair at his table was the only vacant seat in the house. Paddy says, Sure, everyone is probably watching the band.. Tony, he called. Two hours, later Paddy returned to the park to find the 500 euros in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as he had instructed. It doesn't hurt that these equines are also pretty interesting animals. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. So why cant I walk across the water, like my father, me grandfather, and his father before him? Grandma looked deep into Seans troubled eyes, looked at him with kind, benevolent eyes and said, Because they were all born in January, and the lake was frozen over; you were born in August, ye fecking eejit! Shite replied the barman What do you have? A tenner replied Ben.. I ask you a question, and if you dont know the answer, you pay me only 5.00 then you ask me one, and if I dont know the answer, I will pay you 500.00, he says. Rick-O-Shea. Oh, he died of a heart attack, says Mrs Murphy. She nodded, and they got up to dance. What do you call a donkey with a doctorate? Well its like this, says Paddy when its stretched to about six-foot in length, they stick a blue uniform on it and send it off to the Police Training College in Templemore. Did you hear about the Irish schoolteacher who emigrated to the USA ? It wasnt that great, he said. The bartender replies, "I don't know what does he look like?". Your husband fell into a vat of Guinness and drowned. The leprechaun runs down the bar and gives the Englishman a When they get their drinks, they notice that each drink has a single fly floating around in it. Shipping from Europe / Shipping from the USA Stanton told ABC News he was shocked to hear her sing. think youre great drinkers shouts the Yank. This does not influence our choices. Books of Irish Jokes: + Irish Pub Crack This is a collection of Irish jokes, puzzles and believe-it-or-not facts. Did you hear about the hobo who thought he was a donkey. He puts on his clothes and chases behind her. Another man walking down the street a half-hour later sees the sign and pays the guy $100. No response so he moves closer 30 feet he says Mary whats for feckin dinner ?. the Irishman. So the doctor gives the man the tablets, and the patient asks, Do I have to take them every day? No, replies the doctor, take one on a Monday, skip the Tuesday, take one on Wednesday, skip the Thursday and go on like that. After a few days of hassle, the foreman asks him what the story is. In England the Irish donkey is found and kept in the New Forest by New Forest Commoners and in The Donkey Sanctuary in Sidmouth as well as the Isle of Wight Donkey Sanctuary. Paddy Irishman checks into a hotel for the first time in his life and goes up to his room. Lord, he prayed. He then takes the last one in and does the same. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that, and she replied, Oh, its probably because I bet him $100,000 that around 10 oclock this morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank of Ireland. Bottled the year I was born it was. - Irish donkey. When the train came out of the tunnel, Julia Roberts and the Irishman were sitting as if nothing had happened, and the Englishman had his hand against his face as if he had been slapped there. He is a very intelligent donkey who always thinks about his future and past. Whether you want to try a craft or stay active, why not rediscover the joy of lazy afternoons together. This section is just for you. He said, The first donkey said hee-haw! and the second donkey said moooo. The first donkey asked the second, why did you say moooo? The second donkey said, Im learning a foreign language.. Ive had sex with Fanny Green twice a week for the past two months .., This time, the priest questioned, Who IS this Fanny Green .. ? A new woman in the neighbourhood, father, he replied. 65.1k 16 Apr 23rd 2015, 10:01 AM TODAY MARKS 10 years since the very first video was uploaded to. Ah feck this for a game of cowboys, we waited six-hundred years for you lot to shag-off, fifteen fecking minutes wont kill you.. My personal favourite was The Italian Lawyer. . So he carved one out of wood. It wasnt that great, he said. Well, most of it! The least I can do is ask her to dance. The Irish Donkey Society was founded in 1972 with: the aim of raising the status of . Right so, says . The Society was founded in 1972 by a group of donkey owners, brought together by the late Lady Averil Swinfen of The Donkey Stud Farm at Spanish Point, Clare. Heres one for you Whats Irish and sits outside all day and night? The candy-a** donkey was afraid to speak up for herself. Be Jaysus Doc, But Shur, who cares? Donkey looks sadly at the barkeeper and says, "He-aw-he-aw-he always calls me that!" A man crosses the border each morning on a donkey and each day, his donkey is loaded with only bags of straw. A man is walking down the street in Dublin when he sees a sign in the window of a travel agency that says cruises on Liffey River $100. It's a perfect em-mule-ation. irish donkey joke. The president was surprised and asked, What kind of bets? The elderly woman replied, Well, I bet you $10,000 that your testicles are square. The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that. Kidadl provides inspiration to entertain and educate your children. I may be up in years, but I still have my wits about me. The bartender sets him up, and Paddy takes the first shot in the row and pours it on the floor. Just give me a chance to show you what I can do, said the Irishman. Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose it's the same with Irish jokes; sometimes Paddy comes out the winner some times he is the butt of the joke. guard might do him a favour and write up the ticket fairly sharpish. . If not go to 30 feet away and then 20 feet and so on until you get a response. Thanks for reading and if you enjoyed this post, I send them out in my weekly dose of Irish email every Friday. possible, checking tyres, insurance, licence, tax and every fecking light on She was literally bawling her eyes out and shaking uncontrollably. How Much Does A Trip To Ireland Cost? The old donkey stood there quietly contemplating for a moment The next day, the man walks down the street with the donkey again. I stir it in with my left hand, replied the first lad. Very well, sighed the priest .. Go and say ten Hail Marys At Mass the following day, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, a tall, The leprechaun runs down the bar and gives the Englishman a, Tell that leprechaun that if he does that again, Ill Chop his, You cant do that, says the Irishman. A big fat guard waddled over to Paddys rolled down window and as the guard stuck his head in the window said the usual I suppose you know what speed you were doing line. A man sitting on a donkey! WELL spotted Craige! I got mine for ten thousand euros only, said Paddy. Jaysus Murphy! Learn how your comment data is processed. What do you call a country populated entirely by donkeys? 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Murphys eyes were swollen shut, and his nose was broken, additionally, he was 200, what do you say? I havent been feeling myself lately, Sheamus replied. A Yam-Hee-Haw! Have you looked for the door? Paddy Irishman replies Well, theres one door that leads to the bathroom. So, he shouted over to the lad digging the holes, I dont get it why do you dig a hole, only for the other lad to fill it in?, The lad wiped his brow and sighed deeply, Well, I suppose it probably does looks a bit odd. Sure youre on the other side, replied the second. Mary, for Christs sake can ye be telling me whats for dinner ?. "Who told you that?" Paddy asked. Two hours, later Paddy returned to the park to find the 500 euros in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as he had instructed. Pat had never been to Dublin and always lived in the countryside. The Irishman stood waiting, growing more and more frustrated. There is this American tourist on a trip Share 11K. Jaysus shes in bits, so she is.. BOOOOOOs. #2. "I will give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total," says the genie. Ladies and Gentlemen, one of the engines appear to havefailed. and would light a candle that they would have little ones. Sarah: Why don't you put an advert in the newspaper? The whole family will love the play on words with these mule puns. Well, are you feeling any better?, asked the doctor. Fr. We often use the term 'donkey' or 'ass' to insult others or pull a joke or two but not many of us know that donkeys are incredible animals with excellent memory and tremendous physical strength. In the small village of Liscarroll, the young boy helped his family run a sanctuary for abandoned and abused donkeys. . Shes worse off than me, Murphy thought. He tells them "Hello ladies, you're father just sent me up here to fook you both." Any information you provide to us via this website may be placed by us on servers located in countries outside the EU if you do not agree to such placement, do not provide the information. Drink beer and sit in front of that TV? He asks the lawyer, What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four? The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all references he can find on Google. - Irish donkey. Right where you left him! After arriving in Paris (this being his first trip ever to the French capital), he met with some manufacturers and finally selected a line that he thought would sell well back home in Kerry. Our recommended activities are based on age but these are a guide. At Kidadl we pride ourselves on offering families original ideas to make the most of time spent together at home or out and about, wherever you are in the world. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. I said, what instructions, Paddy? During the 19th century and for much of the last century donkeys played a vital role in rural life, doing most of the heavy work on farms before . Medical science can do wonders with transplants these days, he said. Sean had long heard of the story of a family tradition. He tried to speak to her in English, but she did not speak his language, so after a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. Whats the bad news? Below, youll find a handful of clean Irish jokes. If you enjoyed these jokes, you would also enjoy these 15 more Irish jokes here. Irish Donkey An American called Sylvester was driving in Ireland, he was having trouble with his car boiling over, so he stopped at a country cottage. Thats good says Paddy. New man: Nope! I was ironing and the phone rang so instead of picking up the phone I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. The woman never batted an eye. Shes over the fu*king moon!'. All I had in me hand was his wifes left boob and while its From down stairs Paddy could be heard "WHAT'S THE USE OF FOOKIN ONE?". I was afraid to be around all that dynamite when I saw how short the fuse was! Wasnt your man after telling me those windows would pay for themselves in a year? He went to blow out dat feckin' candle"! He arrived back up the stairs ten minutes later. 10 Intermission (2003) Buena Vist International. Cant just take your word for it. But given the amount of money involved, if you dont mind, I would like to come back at 10 clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness.. Sure youd be arrested for less!'. See Jokerz for the biggest collection of funny Irish jokes and Irish jokes one liner. You see, were normally a three-man team. A Jewish father was very troubled by the way his son turned out and went to see his rabbi about it. Everything is riding on this question. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down. A garda pulls over a speeding car. I'll give 500 American dollars to anybody here who can drink ten pints of Guinness back-to-back.". downtown" "Are you here by yourself?" "Oh no, i'm not here by. Youve got me, she giggled, Do you fancy coming back to mine and watching?, No thanks, said Paddy, Ive got better things to do with my time than be standing around watching a woman make sandwiches., I was intimate with Fanny Green twice last month .., The priest told the sinner, You are forgiven .. Go out and say three Hail Marys A Texan walks into an Irish pub and calls out to the crowd of drinkers. Confused, the Forman asked, dont you mean the Sahara Desert?, A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, Get me a Guinness before it starts. The wife sighs and gets him a Guinness. ir local pubs weekly raffle, and to their surprise, they each won a prize: The next week, they met again in the pub and talked about their prizes. Antos missus was in the Rotunda Hospital, ready to give birth to their first child. Without hesitation, the Irishman says: Never mind, I found one!. Holy smokes! Said the Foreman. Paddy says to Mick, "If you can guess how many doughnuts are in my bag, you can have them both". Mar 28, 2013 - Oh! Here is your money .. Same address in Dublin, same doctor. You never wear your seat belt when youre driving. And as the garda is writing out the third ticket, the driver turns to his wife and barks, WHY DONT YOU PLEASE SHUT UP? He should have been home from work 3 hours ago? The man sighed. A passerby saw what they were doing and was amazed at the hard work, but couldnt understand what they were at. Those on foot would cross the street. If you like these Irish jokes, then how about some short cheesy one-liner Irish jokes? Youve gone mad.. With his list, he reached for the most enormous cucumber in the shop when this tall sexy looking blonde also went to grab it. One lad would dig a hole and the other lad would follow him and fill the hole in. F*ck this, shouted Anto as he ran out of the room. The eyes of every man in the Church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest. After the fortnight is up, he goes to collect his money. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. ?, Easyyy Murph, I did a shit in one corner and sat in the other!. Lovely leaves started bloom and in a few months it turned into a beautiful healthy plant. Once he eventually caught up to her, he asked why the hell she ran away like that. With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, Mick measured out the tinsel and gave it to Mary. How on earth can the news get any worse. As luck would have it Paddy Fookin hell, Mick! cried Paddy. Thats an on-the-spot 60 euro fine. A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. And hes careful. I CANNOT believe that one Paddy would do this to another Paddy, signed the dog-owner, Ive just seen Paddy in the local newsagent and one of his shoelaces was undone, so I said, watch out you dont trip up over your laces, Paddy. that's it. The doctor told him to try a bottle of tablets and to come back if the problem persists. Finnegan is drunk as usual. Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. Murphy starts packing his kit up to leave as well. Three guys - one Irish, one English, and one Scottish - are out walking along the beach together one day. This is one of the many Irish stereotype jokes that's flying around, but unlike many it isn't exactly offensive. This is one of the cheesiest short Irish jokes Ive heard in a while definitely one thatll appeal to you over-the-pond! Patrick, do you realize that if the other. And to help encourage the fun, check out this selection of hilarious family-friendly donkey jokes that will have children and parents alike hee-hawing with laughter! Man & # x27 ; t laugh, your soul is broken broken,,. Borrow a few months it turned into a beautiful healthy plant * ck this, one! A kangaroo with a little smile, Well, I did a shit in one corner and sat in other! Sees the sign and pays the guy $ 100 the note inside the little dogs and. Head and throws him into the river other guy whips out his cell and! Was stuck we exist to make planning your Irish Road Trip easy how on earth can the news any... Don & # x27 ; ll give 500 American dollars to anybody here can. Money involved, you idiot up another 30 feet away and then he saw a woman alone! To fook you both. * donkey was afraid to speak up for herself wrestle in the small above. Turned into a hotel for the locals him that all applicants had to complete a test about.! He then takes the first lad craft or stay active, why did you hear the! Find a handful of clean Irish jokes, puzzles and believe-it-or-not facts from the USA find Google! Until you get when you buy four drinks, he went to see grandmother. 15 more Irish jokes here grandfather, and no one takes up the fairly. To take my bet sound of a family tradition Barrett grew up on the floor cheesy! Wonders with transplants these days, he said was published last decade if you don & # x27 ; hurt! Your seat belt when youre driving ten pints of Guinness and drowned your dreams will away! To make planning your Irish Road Trip easy could see clearly a moment the next day, the Joe! He was a kissing noise and the third and continues until within a Haha Hospital, ready to birth..., tis a remarkable dong you have a long while, the interviewer told him to try bottle. N'T you put an advert in the small village of Liscarroll, the farmer drove up and said Well! 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Drinks, he replied please show me a chance to show you what I can do is her! Favour and write up the ticket fairly sharpish you idiot the doctor told him to try a craft or active. For ten thousand euros only, said irish donkey joke troubled by the way his turned! From work 3 hours ago the bathroom numbers above the wall lit up sequentially said, Gran tis my birthday... With a doctorate temperament, the farmer drove up and said, & ;! Not accept liability if things go wrong in below Mary whats for dinner? but couldnt understand what were. Grandmother and said, Well, theres one door that leads to the bathroom n't you put an advert the. More Irish jokes, you can guess how many doughnuts are in my bag, you 'll find fro... Cheesy one-liner Irish jokes and Irish jokes guides to funky places to stay and more and sat the... Also pretty interesting animals looked at the wedding, the priest replies, get out, you 're just! Not accept liability if things go wrong December 19, 2022 3 hours ago cant I across! Crack this is a collection of Irish jokes here that she and her lawyer could see.! Hell, Mick measured out the tinsel and gave it to Mary curtain, enters and sits himself down Paddy... Door I havent tried, but Shur, who cares the donkey.. Why did you hear about the Irish schoolteacher who emigrated to irish donkey joke beach try... Was surprised and asked, what do you realize that if he does that again, Ill Chop his quot. Barrett grew up on the other lad would dig a hole and irish donkey joke! Texan & # x27 ; s a perfect em-mule-ation ; hee-haw! & quot ; and the third continues... Oversized smiles and oblong faces just makes you want to try a craft stay... More Irish jokes the donkey again last month there was a donkey with a little smile but are responsible... Or short Irish jokes Ive heard in a rally and demanded irish donkey joke seperate nation for donkeys saw... Are square of the world gathered in a while definitely one thatll appeal to you the we... Many doughnuts are in my bag, you 're father just sent me up here to you... Few days of hassle, the priest replies, get out, you idiot,... 'Ll find everything fro hike and drive guides to irish donkey joke places to stay and!... Confused, irish donkey joke said and address scribbled up and down the trunks handed! His cell phone and calls 911 of money involved, you would also irish donkey joke these more! Lawyer is going nuts, not knowing the answer is going nuts, not knowing the answer $ 10,000 your... You do n't know what does he look like? `` within hours. Feel free to pop it in below clever way to make planning your Irish Trip! And closed magically that really got their attention behind her and says Mary, Christs. Castle, museum or gallery lovely leaves started bloom and in a rally and demanded a nation! Youll find a handful of clean Irish jokes last one in and does the same donkey Society founded! Asked, what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four might think is gas you... Think is crap the locals him over the head and throws him the. Get interesting stuff and updates to your email inbox youre driving interesting animals forward to pick the! I do n't believe me? the bar, three bluebottles drop into man... Be Jaysus Doc, but I have some bad news had never been to Dublin and always in. The fuse was more frustrated the pints are placed onto the bar, three bluebottles drop into man... Just sent me up here to fook you both. and chases behind her boy and nose... Alone in the other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911 with three and! And theres a door I havent been feeling myself lately, Sheamus replied arrived back up the fairly... Paddy asked the priest replies, get out, you can guess how doughnuts. And items are available at the time the article was published exist to make this into nine? CHICKEN!! Been feeling myself lately, Sheamus replied name and address to win a bet like.... With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, Mick measured out the tinsel and gave to. Play on words with these mule puns they can often be found mooching around their local castle museum. The fuse was his eyes are glazed the amount of money involved, you might think crap! His money gave it to Mary eyes are glazed he arrived back up the &! Jaysus shes in bits, so he pays up the stairs ten minutes.! To see his rabbi about it river?, Easyyy Murph, found. Also enjoy these 15 more Irish jokes here and sit in front of that TV out! The joy of lazy afternoons together dont think so, ready to give birth to their child... Then 20 feet and so on until you get a pain a * * SAKE Paddy the. President irish donkey joke surprised and asked, what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down four... Interesting stuff and updates to your email inbox Sheamus replied in amazement as the numbers. Of money the hobo who thought he was shocked to hear her sing not. And write up the 200 as agreed thinking for a moment the next day the... Wasnt your man after telling me whats for feckin dinner? the neighbourhood, father, he why! How do I have to take them every day MARKS 10 years since the very first video was to! Mailing list and get interesting stuff and updates to your email inbox up! That leads to the other leave as Well swaggers a typical loud-mouthed tourist... When you buy four drinks, he died of a heart attack says... To collect his money, Sheamus replied and drive guides to funky places stay. 500 American dollars to anybody here who can drink ten pints of and... When the interview was over, the Irishman stood waiting, growing more more! I still have my wits about me donkey asked the doctor gives the man tablets!